Snapshots
by Wordsworth99
Summary: A series of snapshots from Keisuke Takahashi's life as he slowly falls in love with a woman, who'll only ever love him second best at most. I decided that it was time for a Keisuke fanfic out there. There aren't too many, so here goes! KeisukeXOC.
1. The challenge

Hello everyone,

Okay, this is my first Initial D fanfic. I'm so excited about this, the idea actually came to me as I was walking home from work listening to a little DJ Okawari (I love him). Anyway, I developed it a little and have been sitting on it for a while. In any case, I think it's time for the big reveal!

SUMMARY: Like the title suggests, this fanfiction is a series of snapshots from Keisuke's life as he slowly falls in love with a woman who'll always love him second best. Everything is written strictly form his perspective (third person omniscient).

Please R&R, I'd really like feedback on my writing.

DISCLAIMMER: I do NOT own Initial D. I just love the characters and love to play around with them.

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**Chapter 1: The Challenge**

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He saw her skipping down the sidewalk in her pretty red dress fluttering in the breeze just a little bit below her knees. The soft auburn curls on her head bounced up and down as her made her way to end of the street. _Deceptive_, he thought. The day Keisuke Takahashi had raced her, she'd been just dainty. Yet it was only well into their race, did he notice her aura menacing and powerful. Now she was innocent, almost childlike in her beauty and stature. Today he wanted to know what it would be like to caress her soft skin, hold her slim frame against his lean one, and feel those long soft curls fall over his arms as they cascaded down her back. Keisuke knew she was beautiful the moment he'd laid eyes on her, but today, in that moment as she skipped down the sunny sidewalk, he thought she looked absolutely transcendent. And just as he thought it, he chided himself for thinking the same as any man would. He was better than the common man.

Suddenly, as she turned to cross the street, she saw him, leaning against the brick wall of a building, watching her with an incomprehensible look in his eye. She broke out into a large smile and gave him a small wave, completely catching her off guard. She quickly looked both ways and before he could even straighten up, was already crossing the street and heading in his direction, all the while struggling to keep hold of her many shopping bags.

"We have to stop meeting like this," she said, cocking her head to one side.

"You owe me a rematch," Keisuke replied, getting straight to business. He couldn't afford to be charmed any more than he already was – after all, he had to think of his career and he'd promised himself he wouldn't think of women, whom in his opinion were the great downfall of men, until after he was successful. Nevertheless, a strange pang of guilt filled his gut for brushing her off so brusquely as her beautiful smile faltered for a moment. "How about next Saturday," he asked, ignoring the guilt.

He watched her expression change as she thought, quite possibly, about her upcoming commitments. "I'm sorry, I'm busy all next weekend. Can we do it the Saturday after?"

"Sure," he replied, cooly. Then after a moment, curiosity got the better of him. "Will you be challenging another opponent next Saturday?" He was sure he would have heard is she had been challenged by anyone else. He had to make sure she wouldn't lose before he beat her first.

"It's not a battle," she said somewhat reluctantly. He didn't miss the delicate blush gracing her otherwise pale cheeks. Seeing that Keisuke was expecting more details she hesitantly told him, "I have plans with me boyfriend."

Suddenly, Keisuke could feel an ugly feeling creeping over him. "That's disappointing," he said. This time, her smile didn't falter, it vanished completely. But that didn't stop Keisuke. "Your blowing off a challenge just so you can play around with your boyfriend on a date? All I'm asking for is a half hour of your time and your boyfriend can't even spare you for that much? I thought you were a lot more serious than that. I can't believe I actually lost to someone like you!" He spat out disgusted.

He could tell she was angry. Her soft features were now dead cold, but Keisuke didn't care. Somehow he felt a little better now that she wasn't smiling like the sun. He bet those bags were full of stuff for her date. He wanted to smack them out of her hand, but he felt that it was enough to just rain all over her parade. He turned around and was about to walk away when he felt a WHACK on his arm. Turning around to face her again, he realized she'd just hit him with one of her bags. Despite the annoyed look on his face Keisuke couldn't help but smirk at her ridiculous attempt to hurt him. She was adorable even when she was angry.

"Maybe the reason why you lost to me is because you're a soulless jerk who obviously can't get a girlfriend and has to take it out on people who actually do have a love life."

"_What did you say?_ I can get a girlfriend, I ju-"

"You think it makes you a better driver, but it just makes you pathetic," she said interrupting him. That wiped the smirk right off his face. "When I beat you two weeks ago, I was so happy and proud of my accomplishment the first person I called was Eiji-kun. Who do _you _call to share your victories with? Maybe sharing them with your brother or teammates is good enough for you, but I don't have that. I don't have a family, and I'm new in town so I don't have a team or any friends. All I have is Eiji-kun. So yes, I would rather spend my weekend, my _entire_ weekend, exclusively with Eiji-kun, who is driving 20 hours from Miyazaki to see me, than trying to rope in a race with you. And don't worry, when I wipe the floor with you two weeks from now, you'll know exactly how serious I am."

She brushed past Keisuke and walked quickly down the street to where her car was parked. She got in quickly, slammed the door shut, and drove away with such a vengeance, she left Keisuke standing there in a cloud of dust feeling like a complete tool.


	2. Meet the Boyfriend

Hi folks,

Here is another chapter =) Hope you enjoy it! And as always please please please R&R. It's so encouraging for authors to get feedback and all it takes is a second.

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**Chapter 2: Meet the Boyfriend**

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The Saturday was a warm and sunny day. The perfect day for a race, Keisuke thought. If only she wasn't off gallivanting around with that boyfriend of hers. He was getting restless. And even though they hadn't parted on amicable terms a few days ago when he'd issued the challenge, he felt like a little kid eagerly awaiting Christmas morning. Maybe it was a good thing he would be racing her next week, by now the word would be out and the gallery would be huge.

Since Project D's total domination over the Kanto region and subsequent disbanding, Keisuke's loss to an unknown female driver had come as a huge shock to everyone. Everyone wanted a piece of the girl who beat Keisuke Takahashi. But no one seemed to be able to pin her down long enough to issue a challenge. Keisuke was secretly quite pleased about that. Keisuke was bent on restoring his pride, but more than that, he wanted to feel the adrenaline pumping through his veins. He knew it wasn't going to be easy, but he'd been practicing every single night on Akagi. For the first time since the Red Suns became the fastest team on Akagi, he would be racing on his home course. It only made sense since Akagi was also her home course. It was curious that he'd never seen her there before. But then he remembered what she'd said… new in town.

The door to the Family's restaurant jingled open and Keisuke recognized his brother, whote coat and stethoscope dangling from his neck, and Fumihiro, the best friendwalking towards the booth where he was seated. The three sat down after exchanging a quick greeting and ordered their meal. It was always a rare treat to see his brother these days. Ryosuke Takahashi had followed in his father's footsteps and started his residency at the Takahashi hospital. He didn't know much about the inner medical circle, but knew enough to know that his brother was regarded as the local celebrity amongst his fellow peers. It didn't surprise Keisuke much, his brother was always a legend no matter what he did. It was a rough adjustment taking over the Red Suns and leading a team without the experience of his brother. And in the early months, Keisuke had missed Ryosuke terribly. Ryosuke was on call most days and nights. When he did get time off, it was spent at the hospital doing research, dictating charts, or catching up on something or another. Ryosuke only ever came home to sleep and shower – and even that he did at the hospital more often than home these days.

"I hear you royally pissed her off," said Fumihiro, cutting to the chase. Ryosuke chuckled, knowing full well how hot his brother's temper ran.

"Great, she's telling the world about how much of a jerk I am."

"Not the whole world, just us. And only because we asked her if she knew why you were being so sulky," said Ryosuke.

"I wasn't sulking! When did you have a chance to talk to her, anyway?" Asked Keisuke. How did his brother made the time to talk to the girl who beat him on his home course and not his own little brother?

"Ryosuke needed a drive after his rotation the other day. And I never pass up a chance to ride shotgun when your brother's taking the car out for a spin." Keisuke scowled and pushed around his peas with his fork for good measure.

"So do you have a strategy? Think you can beat her this time?" Ryosuke looked at his brother with his usual penetrating gaze, making the younger Takahashi feel like we was twenty years old all over again.

"Maybe… She's definitely impressive. I deserved to lose the first time round. She completely threw me off my game. I underestimated her because I'd never seen her dive before and she Akagi was her home course. I was humouring her, and I think part of the reason why was because she's a girl so I automatically assumed she was just being cute with me. Don't look at me like that," he said noticing the other two's expression. "It's not like I have anything against female racers, I never underestimated Kyoko. But Kyoko doesn't have that disarming smile and those gigantic eyelashes. _She_ didn't challenge me to a race on my own home course. I thought it was a bad joke going worse." Keisuke at least had the decency to look suitably ashamed.

"So you thought she was flirting with you. That's awkward," said Fumihiro, even more amused than before.

"The whole time she's got a boyfriend!" Said Keisuke sounding completely miffed, like he was the victim in all this.

"Let me get this straight," interjected Ryosuke. "She challenged you to a race while you were training the Red Suns. You misunderstood her and raced half-heartedly. Then you lost. And she has a boyfriend. I'm surprised you didn't sulk longer," teased Ryosuke.

Just then, the door opened with a jingle and who should walk in, but the subject of their conversation. And she wasn't alone. Fumihiro wasted no time in flagging the couple over while Keisuke buried his face in his hands to hide his embarrassment.

It was only when they got to his table and seated themselves did Keisuke look up and caught a sight of her. She looked even more breathtaking than she had in her red dress, if that were possible.

"Ryosuke-san, Fumihiro-san," she paused and somewhat stiffy said, "Keisuke-san. This is my boyfriend, Eiji-kun. He's come all the way from Miyazaki, so I'm showing him around today."

"Pleasure to meet you all. Thank you for taking such good care of my girlfriend all this time," he said, politely.

_Great,_ Keisuke thought, _he's nice._ With his arm draped casually over her shoulder, even Keisuke had to admit, the two made a great looking couple. Any fool looking at the two could tell how in love they were, after all, that rosy tinge never left her cheeks, and that sunshine smile lit up her face every time he said something. And Eiji-kun was every bit the man she said he would be; polite, funny, clearly adoring of his girlfriend, tall, and even Keisuke had to begrudgingly admit, handsome. He stood a foot taller than her, dark windswept hair with bookish glasses which he somehow made look fashionable. He was a complete contrast to Keisuke who came off as a thug with his bleach blonde spiky hair and fowl mood.

"My girlfriend tells me you gave her quite a run for her money," said Eiji-kun, looking at Keisuke.

Keisuke saw her redden and shift uncomfortably in her chair. "I was caught off guard, it won't happen again," he responded, looking directly at her.

"Good, I'd rather you be at your best when I beat you," she scowled.

Keisuke chose to ignore her. "So what else did your girlfriend say about me?" He asked Eiji-kun, knowing exactly what buttons he was pushing. His eyes never left her, even though he was speaking with her boyfriend. Ryosuke and Fumihiro watched with odd fascination.

Eiji-kun glanced at his girlfriend and noticed the tension. "She said you were aggressive. That you had a one track mind and saw things in black and white. She might've said you were stubborn and obstinate too." He paused to read Keisuke's expression. Then deciding to be mature he finished with, "She said you had a fire when you raced, a passion she's only seen very rarely and that she couldn't help but admire you for it. Of course, that part came after all the crap she said about you first," he chuckled.

"Eiji-kun!" She exclaimed, now very red and deeply embarrassed. Keisuke fought hard to keep a straight face. It wasn't much, but somehow, that compliment made him puff up with pride. She bowed her head slightly in Keisuke's direction and said, "Alright, alright, I'm sorry for being mean to you. I have a short temper sometimes."

"I'm sure he deserved it," said Fumihiro, cheekily. "So do you street race as well, Eiji-san?"

At that, she couldn't help but laugh. Keisuke noticed Eiji-kun redden this time and look oddly interested in his food. "I'm afraid my boyfriend is lacking in that department. He's terrified of speed and drives at least 10 below the limit." Keisuke would have thought Eiji insulted if he hadn't seen how endearingly she said it. How could someone so fast be in love with someone so slow! Keisuke vowed that he'd only ever fall in love with a racer. Relationships were hard when there was no common ground and women who didn't race didn't talk about anything that was actually important. "He makes up for it in other ways," she said, answering his unspoken question. "He's an absolute genius! He's a veterinarian. He saved my kitten's life, you know. That's how we met." Keisuke thought he would puke. Of course Saint Eiji would be an animal lover too.

"Genius veterinarian from Miyazaki, huh?" said Ryosuke. "I think I may have heard of you. Don't tell me, are you the co-founder of Japan's largest animal shelter by any chance?"

"Well, I wouldn't know if it's the largest…"

"That's him," she interjected proudly. "As soon as I'm done engineering school here in Akagi, I'm moving back to Miyazaki."

Keisuke could almost picture it now – the dog doctor saving animals while his beautiful wife managed the shelter. He bet they'd probably have two kids, a boy and a girl, a dog, one they'd probably rescued, and an estate with a stone garden. It was so picture perfect Keisuke decided it was time to leave before he made a mockery of the two.

Keisuke placed some cash on the table. "I'm late for a meeting," he said. "I hope you don't slack too much this weekend, because I won't be going easy on you next week." With that he put his hands in his pockets and walked away feeling vaguely satisfied that he'd had the last word.


	3. A Bitter End

Hi guys,

I came out with another chapter =) I think this turned out pretty good and it basically sets up the premise for the rest of the story. You're going to see exactly the kind of issues that the two will face from here on in. Since I've got the base of the story published, I'll probably be doing weekly updates from now on, but I do have a tonne of school, we'll see how it goes. Reviews would really encourage me though!

PS. I did some post-publishing editing. Boy was I sleepy the first time round! Anyway, hopefully all the typos are gone now =)

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**Chapter 3: A Bitter End**

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Keisuke was positively furious. He was so upset he'd left a shoe shaped dent in the guard rail on Mount Akagi. At 9:30, there was no sign of her, but he wasn't worried – she'd show up. At 9:45, he was starting to get a little antsy. Maybe she was like Takumi and showed up last minute? By the time 10:00 rolled around, he was still ready to give her the benefit of the doubt. High volume traffic, perhaps? 10:30 – maybe an accident had hit somewhere and the roads had closed down, because nothing could explain her being SO freaking late! But then by 11:00pm he knew that she had stood him up. He couldn't remember a time when he'd been SO genuinely pissed off at a woman. Not since he'd broken up with his last girlfriend when he was still a delinquent and sworn off women until he was successful.

He'd been up training every single moment of that week. Between his day job, managing the Red Sun's and his professional racing career, he spent every moment on Akagi and hadn't even bothered coming home to sleep. He'd just park in the lot and catch a nap. He'd put in SO much effort, he couldn't believe she didn't even have the courtesy to call and cancel if she couldn't make it. He knew she wasn't chicken. She couldn't be, after all the mouthing off she'd done a week before. So it was obviously something else. And it had better be something life and death!

He was tempted to call it a night and just head home, but he couldn't sit still.

"Keisuke-san, people are starting to leave. She didn't show, so everyone is saying it's your victory," said Kenta, trying to improve his mentor's foul mood.

"It doesn't matter who's victory it was, a victory by forfeit might as well be no victory at all…" Then after a moment, a thought came to Keisuke. "Kenta, you've got a friend who works in the Transportation Ministry right?" he asked.

The younger man nodded and listened carefully as Keisuke asked him for a favour.

A few phone calls later, Keisuke knew exactly where he would find the girl who stood him up. He wanted to go right now, burst through her doors and demand an explanation. But a grown 24 year old man knocking on a young 20 year old woman's door, especially at this time of night seemed sketchy and was bound to land him in some trouble. He would just have to wait until tomorrow to see her. That way he'd have time to cool off as well. Or so he thought.

He wasn't any less pissed off in the morning as he had been the night before. While his day job was busy enough, the only thought that occupied his head right now was that she had backed out, hadn't had the decency to even give him a rematch. What Keisuke couldn't stand more than a novice with a bad attitude, were racers who weren't serious about the road – racers who thought they could just get away with wasting everyone's time.

The sun had already set as Keisuke approached the building she lived in. He'd had Kenta track down her address using her licence plate number since he figured she probably wouldn't dare show her face around ever again. He found her listed in the directory beside the buzzer bit no one answered. Knowing she'd have to come home eventually, he followed a man inside the building and took the stairs up to the fifth floor where she lived. He found her apartment and knocked on the door. No answer, what he expected. What he hadn't expected was for the door to creak open.

_Crap_, he thought. What was he supposed to do now? He wanted to yell at her, not break into her home and scare the crap out of her! He was doing a great job of impersonating a crook.

The apartment was dark inside but he could see the shadow of a figure sitting on the sofa, the dim candle half burnt making her shadow look strange and other worldly. Keisuke knocked on the door and announced his presence. It was curiosity getting the better of him than anything else now. "it's Keisuke… I'm coming in," he said. She didn't answer.

Slowly he entered the apartment and only when he'd come closer to the sofa she was seated on, did a faint glimmer of recognition flicker in her eyes. But it was gone as soon as it came. Keisuke found her dressed in a black camisole and shorts so short, it made him avert his gaze when he saw her. She seemed dazed, eyes sunken, like she hadn't slept in days. Her beautiful mass of auburn hair was matted and tangled in a mess. Her cheeks were sullen and hollow like she hadn't been eating either. Her expression was blank. There was a stranger who had helped himself into her apartment and she hadn't reacted. Keisuke was starting to get a little worried.

She tilted her head up with effort to look him in the eye. "Kei…" she seemed to run out breath, her throat clearly dry.

Keisuke bent down on one knee so he was level with her. He took her head in his hands to examine her for anything odd.

"Keisuke… what are you doing here?" she asked with difficulty, her voice hoarse.

He noticed a frame with a picture of her and Eiji lying at her feet. "Why are you sitting in the dark?" He asked gently. He started to put the pieces together and knew what had likely happened. "Come one, let's put on some lights, okay?" But as he stood, a small tug on his shirt stopped him from moving. Her small hand, attached to her small wrist gripped him tightly, so he sat back down, eye level with her on the couch. He couldn't help but feel irritated. This definitely wasn't normal. Weren't women supposed to wallow, eat ice cream, and drink when they broke up with their boyfriends?

"Look, there are plenty of men out there. I can't imagine you having any trouble finding a new boyfriend." He meant it as a compliment, but as he said it, even _he_ noticed how insulting that sounded. He couldn't help it, he wasn't used to comforting women. The ones he'd dated in the past, he hadn't cared about, and men just solved their problems with a race or sake, usually. It seldom required talking.

"For what it's worth," he said, trying again, "it's his loss. He was lucky to have such an adoring girlfriend. Any man would be lucky to have that. He didn't know how good he had it. You obviously couldn't get enough of him," Keisuke couldn't keep the bitterness from that last bit out.

But it didn't matter, it seemed whatever he said had only made it worse. Her shoulders started to tremble and her face contorted in pain as the tears started streaming down her face.

_Oh great,_ he thought, _she's crying._ He hated it when women cried. It always made him feel like the bad guy, even though he hadn't done anything wrong. He watched her for a few moments, then trying to appease her said, "come on, you're much stronger than this. You really want to be crying over some chump?" That was not the right thing to say apparently, because it only made her cry harder. Now Keisuke was losing patience. "Okay, that's enough! Stop crying!" He yelled. "You won't be the first person to get dumped and you won't be the last. It's stupid to sit here in a dark room and wallow in your misery! Get a hold of yourself!"

"Get out!" she said. Suddenly, with a force he didn't know she had, she threw the frame across the room and watched it shatter. Violently, she tried to push him away but he wasn't budging. "Get out, get out, get out!" She sobbed. He grabbed her shoulders as she pounded against his chest begging him to just leave her alone. He grabbed her shoulders and forced her to look at him.

"I came here to get an explanation for yesterday," he said, hoping that it would break her out of her despair.

She gasped, "yesterday…" suddenly remembering, "our race."

"That's right. And you stood me up. You wasted my time along with at least 100 other people's who came to watch. I was willing to give you the benefit of the doubt but I can't believe you wuld blow off a challenge, seclude yourself from society, and sit here in a dark room moping around because your boyfriend dumped you!" He could tell he was upsetting her, but so what! She deserved it! All that anger from yesterday was bubbling over and coming out like fire, destroying everything in its path. "Who would want to be with such a clingy girl anyway? I knew it wouldn't last, any idiot watching you could figure that out." Now he was just being spiteful and bitter that he'd been shafted because of some girl's personal problems. He hated it when people's personal lives intermingled with their professional.

Then he looked at her heartbroken expression and he started to feel bad. He was being harsh, wasn't he? "I didn't mean that," he tried to rectify. "If he means that much to you, why don't you just go and see him? I mean, you guys were ready to get married last week, one fight isn't bound to change that right?" He realized that was the real reason he was mad. The two were so pukably in love. He couldn't believe their love had been so superficial and fragile that something could have ended it so quickly. But no matter what he was expecting, it certainly wasn't what she said next.

"He's dead."

A pin drop silence filled the room following her words. The silence was deafening and suffocating. At first he thought he'd heard wrong. Then she choked out the words again, "Eiji-kun… he," struggling to keep a straight face, "he was going home, on the expressway. He was always terrified of crashing," she said, her throat tightening as she struggled to talk properly.

Tears continued to stream down her face. "I thought about it," she said painfully between sobs. "I thought about going to meet him. He'd be waiting for me on the other side and we'd never have to be apart. The distance between us would close and I'd never have to hate myself so much for deciding to create that distance in the first place… _But I couldn`t do it,_" she said in a terribly strained voice. "I was _so _terrified…" she couldn't go on any longer. "I'm such a coward!" She said with disgust in her voice.

Keisuke felt like he'd been punched. As usual, he'd jumped the gun, assumed the worst and felt like a complete ass. He'd never felt so ashamed of himself. She didn't deserve all his yelling.

"Believe me," she said, "I wish he'd just broken up with me. I wish it was only a fight. That way at least I'd have the future to look forward to. But now? How am I supposed to go on without him?" She cried. "How?" she gasped through sobs.

Keisuke drew her in close and felt her cry into his chest. He tightened his hold on her and stroked her hair. It seemed to calm her down a little. They stood in her hall for some time, until Keisuke broke the silence. "Have you been alone all week?" She didn't answer. "Do you have anyone you can stay with?" He asked her gently. Then he remembered, she said she didn't have a family or any friends here. He looked down at her head. He felt her erratic breathing becoming steadier. And finally exhausted from all the tension, he felt her go limp in his arms as she collapsed against him.

He looked at her and for the first time all night, she looked peaceful. She looked a hot mess but something about her… she was so unbelievably fragile. He couldn't believe he hadn't seen that before. He sighed, thinking how the hell he got himself into this. He lifted her into his arms, she was much too light and he knew she hadn't been eating right. He kicked off his shoes, awkwardly locked the front door as he passed it and walked into her bedroom. He laid her down softly into her bed, removed her socks and pulled the covers over her head. He was painfully aware of the fact that he was in a beautiful half naked girl's room, and the thought made his gut clench as he tried to exercise some self-control. He made a few calls to let his family know where he was and not to expect him home. Once he was done he settled down on a chair in her bedroom and started to read one of her engineering textbooks in an attempt to keep his mind from straying into the dirty. And finally, he drifted off to sleep.


	4. Family

Hey friends! Guess what? Another chapter, that's what! XD! I know it's kinda late, but I've been bogged down with school so it's been a bit of a challenge getting this out. Anyway, let me know what you think. Please R&R. PS. I'll go back and proof read this chapter, I don't exactly have a beta but I wanted to get it out so bear with me in case there are any errors (but there shouldn't be since I've already done one read through after I wrote it).

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**Chapter 4: Family**

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"… _Absolutely not! We aren't running some charity here!"_

"_Dear, just think about it. She doesn't have anyone…"_

"_Our son spent three nights with her, and now she's moving in? She doesn't have _anybody _else? Really? What kind of a woman moves in with some guy she doesn't even know! Nope, she's not staying here. If this was a few days, maybe, but not on a long term, undefined period of time basis…. Don't you see, I'm not forbidding this because I'm trying to be hostile, but our son's getting duped by some woman! Don't you remember the last time that happened? I'm doing this for his own good."_

"_Look, it's been a long time since he talked about anyone. And besides, he said there's nothing going on between the two of them... yet."_

"_And there won't be anything happening under MY roof!"_

Keisuke could _just_ hear the muffled words of his parents through the door of the drawing room, as they argued about whether or not the fragile woman waiting in the car could live in their house. Normally, his parents tended to give him free rein with whatever he did, but seeing as it was their house he needed their permission first. He hadn't seen his dad so riled up since Keisuke was in high school and couldn't keep it together for more than a day. It hadn't been easy convincing her to come with him to his home either in the first place.

He'd woken from his exhausted sleep by an ear splitting scream the morning after he'd spend the night at her place. After having had very little time to rest before the long awaited race, the second he'd shut his eyes on the chair in her bedroom, he was out like a light. The scream startled him so much, he'd flipped over the chair he was sleeping in and landed hard on the floor with a resounding THUD! "Ouch… Where's the fire?!" He asked dazed and panicked. Focusing, he realized she was seated upright on her bed, huddled into the wall, the covers firmly around her bare shoulders.

Calming down and embarrassed she seemed to realize where she was and who he was and what had happened the night before. "I'm sorry… I just… I'm…" She looked down, avoiding eye contact. Keisuke had the decency to blush, realizing his compromising situation.

"It's okay. Just get dressed and come out," said Keisuke. Before she could say anything he had left her alone in her bedroom, sorted out the awful crick in his neck, and rummaged through the fridge to scrounge up something for breakfast.

Keisuke was already seated, coffee in hand, omelette and toast ready to dig into when she came into the kitchen. "You didn't have to do all this…" she said weakly, seeing the spread.

"I was hungry," he replied. "I was so nervous about the race I skipped dinner and didn't have a chance to eat later." _Crap,_ he thought, _what the hell am I saying, it's just going to make her feel worse!_ "But you know, it's okay, I was starting to get fat anyway, I could do with a skipped meal or two," he tried to correct.

"Keisuke-san..."

"You know," he had kept talking, "if you don't eat breakfast your body doesn't use energy as efficiently? Aniki told me. He's a genius. He's going to be a pretty amazing doctor someday."

"Kei-"

"But don't worry, you'll figure that out for yourself soon, he loves coming to the galleries on his time off, you'll probably meet him a lot there."

"_Keisuke-san!_" And this time, Keisuke couldn't ignore her. "Look, I appreciate this, I do. But I just want to be alone. Please just go home."

Avoiding eye contact he sipped his coffee. They sat there in silence. She hadn't touched her toast or omelette. "I think leaving you alone would be problematic for me."

"Excuse me?" She said, confused. "How exactly will my being alone be problematic for _you?_" She challenged.

"You owe me a rematch. If you stop eating, and die of malnutrition, I won't get to beat you fair and square like I should have in the first place. I have street cred to maintain, you know," he said nonchalantly.

He could see that she was struggling to figure out what to make of that. Finally, it seemed she found the whole thing rather amusing and chuckled lightly. "Well, you're welcome to stay, but I have to leave."

This was news to him. "Where're you going?" He asked.

"Not that it's any of your business, but Eiji-kun was paying for this apartment. I'm a student so I can't really afford a decent place and Eiji-kun said he didn't want me living in some sketchy dump. So when I moved here, he found this place for me and said he'd take care of the rent – after all, the plan was to get married in two years after my degree so we didn't see a point in keeping our assets separate. Anyway, I can't afford to keep this place so I need to make alternate arrangements."

Keisuke took all this in and fully realized the predicament that she was in. Not only had she lost the man she loved, she was also going to have to move out, downsize, and start a new lifestyle. He couldn't believe how much love and trust there had been between the couple. He didn't know anyone who was willing to be in a long distance relationship, let alone financially supporting their girlfriend. Guess, Eiji wasn't such a bad guy after all, Even though Keisuke had found him annoying.

"It's too bad," she said. "I love this place. Every time I come home, I smell Eiji-kun. I spray his usual cologne in the apartment, you see. It makes me feel like I'm at home with him. Otherwise I'd never be able to get comfortable here. After all, heart is where the home is, and my heart will always be with Eiji-kun." She paused, biting her bottom lip, clearly making an effort not to break down.

Keisuke put down his coffee and looked at her carefully. She was still avoiding eye contact. But this time, her head was tilted back, leaning against the back of the kitchen chair and he could tell she was taking in the scent of the apartment. "I'll save you the trouble." Keisuke said suddenly. "Why don't you stay with me and my family?"

That got her attention. She opened her eyes and tilted her head to look at him. After a moment where Keisuke wasn't sure if she was actually considering the offer, or considering how insane he was, she politely declined saying, "Thank you, but I think it's best if I just found my own place."

"It's no big deal. Our place is huge and we have plenty of space. You'll have complete privacy and you'll save on rent. You can concentrate on your school work without stressing out over what bills you have to pay. It's the perfect arrangement." He said. Keisuke knew it was a bit forward and awkward, but he really didn't want her to be alone. He felt like he couldn't trust her to be on her own, especially not in the mental state she's been in last night. He wanted her to be close where he could keep an eye out for her.

"You know," she responded, "I don't need you to be my knight in shining armour. Eiji-kun provided for me, but we were going to be a family. You're just an acquaintance of mine and we're just barely friends… if we are friends, I mean? I'm not even sure what we are. Look, what I'm trying to say is, you have no reason to go this far for me. I can't live off of your charity. And I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself, I've done it plenty of times before." Seeing Keisuke's disappointed expression, she softened up a little. "Don't get me wrong," she sighed, "I'm grateful that you were there for me last night – I don't think I've slept that well all week and I was exhausted out of my mind. I just don't think it's wise for me to impose myself on your family like that. To be honest, I just want to be alone with my memories of Eiji-kun."

"That's completely ridiculous! You expect me to leave you alone just so you can wallow in your own misery? I know it's rough, but you can't shut yourself up here. You have a life to live."

"You don't understand do you? I might as well be dead. I have no one! I never had anyone, but I didn't need anyone either. All I've ever needed was Eiji-kun, and now that he's gone, I might as well be dead. I'm grateful to you for being so kind to me, but it would be kindest to just let me be. I'm tired Keisuke-san. I want to sulk and mope around and be depressed because that's how I feel. You being here, I feel like I should be entertaining you. So please just leave me alone. And let me mourn the loss of my boyfriend in peace."

Keisuke considered her perspective e and realized he couldn't snap her out of her grief so quickly. But he refused to give in. "Fine, You can be alone with your memories of Eiji-kun…" A moment later, and rather shamelessly, he added, "…at my house in my guest bedroom. I swear, no one will bother you."

He could sense her frustration. It was kind of cute. Better angry than depressed in his books, he thought. "Please don't be so unreasonable. Why are you even doing this for me?"

Why _was _he doing this? He thought to himself. And he knew the answer to that question: he just couldn't leave her alone. She wasn't caring for herself properly and being alone would suffocate her. She'd just get more and more miserable.

He remembered the day he challenged her to the rematch. She had looked so vibrant then, so full of life, feisty even. Her smile had been mesmerizing and the whole world had blurred behind her out of focus, while she was the only one he could see. He wanted to see that again. But instead he said, "I told you, you owe me a rematch. You can stay away if you want, but I'm not going anywhere, so either you deal with me following you everywhere you go or you can come to my place and I'll actually leave you alone. You're choice."

Keisuke had refused to leave until she gave in. It took two days of imposing himself at her house with a make shift toothbrush, crappy undergarments he'd purchased from the corner store, and his clothes severely soiled, not having changed in a while. After a lot of discussion, which basically meant him talking one sidedly since she hardly spoke a word to him, she caved and decided she would move in with Keisuke since it seemed it was the only way she'd get any peace.

The next step was getting his parent's approval. He had asked her to wait in the car while he asked his parents. He thought that as little details as possible the better. And of course, as expected while his mother had been a pushover, his father was not pleased…

"_That's enough, honey! I'm sorry, but she's a poor child who has no one! Can you imagine if your best friend passed away in a horrible accident? She needs people around her!"_

"_You just want her to stay because you've always wanted a daughter!"_

"_That's…. not entirely wrong…." _Keisuke sighed. Was it time for him to intervene again?

"_Okay, so how long would this arrangement be for? Forever?"_

"_I don't care! We're keeping her!" _His mother retorted.

"_Fine, do what you want! This is why Keisuke got so spoiled in the first place! You just let him do whatever he wants regardless of who it inconveniences. Hmpf!" _His father puffed.

A look of satisfaction took over his mother's face as she walked out of the drawing room, to find Keisuke suspciously close to the doors.

"Alright, son, I know you've been listening. Let's go welcome her to our home, we'll set her up in the guest bedroom upstairs."

"Mom… thank you… and I'm so sorry for the trouble."

"No trouble at all. But there are conditions. There will be no funny business in my house, understand? She will be in her room, and you will be outside of her room at all times, if you catch my drift. It's not proper for a man to compromise a lady's honour when she is vulnerable."

Keisuke blushed, feeling like a little child. Sheepsihly he nodded. How ever his father said Keisuke's mother spoiled him no one could doubt that she was a proper lady and had raised her sons to be gentlemen – for the most part, despite Keisuke's rough patch in high school. It's lucky she hadn't asked him if he'd preserved any ladies' honour back then, he would certainly have been unable to look her in the eye.

The petite woman, Reiko Takahashi, followed her son to the car where she found the girl resting her head on the window. Keisuke's mother was a perceptive woman and seeing her son leaning over the car door talking to the petite delicate girl, she could immediately tell that her son had fallen hard for the girl. But whether or not Keisuke realized that, she had no idea. She was glad that the girl would be living with them. After the last experience her son had had with women, she was determined to make sure that no one ever hurt him like that ever again. She welcomed the opportunity to get to know this woman and judge for herself whether or not she was worthy of her precious child.

Despite her intentions, Reiko was excited at the prospect of having another woman in the house. She was looking forward to spending time with her. But it seemed that warming up would take some time. The girl was polite enough – she'd greeted her with a deep bow and profusely thanked her for her kindness. But she could tell, that the passing of her friend, whomever he was, had left the girl broken and desolate. Reiko could see the valiant effort she made to greet her with a smile. She was sure the girl most likely wanted to crawl into bed and stay there for a long time. And she was positive it was her son who had imposed himself on her and forced her to stay with their family, mostly likely because he was too scared to leave her alone. She could understand that. After all, it was something she would have done. Reiko and Keisuke were very much mother and son in that regard.

In no time at all, the three had moved the girl's things into the guest bedroom. Keisuke's father had come by after to greet the girl after he'd calmed down a little. Keisuke was pleased to see that his father seemed to have taken a bit of a soft spot with her. The four sat in her room and helped her set up the major things. Once they had finished, his mother stayed to help her unpack her clothes while the men left to order something special in honour of their new house guest. Keisuke only wished his brother had been home to join them as well. But it didn't matter, Aniki would come home by dinner and then the family would be complete then. Keisuke took a final look at his mother and the girl. She was smiling shyly at something his mother was saying. Content, he turned away and followed his father out. This was going to be the start of a beautiful friendship, his instincts told him so.

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**Author's Note:**

And that's a wrap guys =) So our girl's moved in an getting comfy with the family, are we excited? =D The fun begins here. Please please please review. I really want to know what I could improve on. As a writer, feedback is SO important to us authors, we really strive to grow and knowing what our audience is looking for really helps us make better chapters. So don't forget to review! Til next time =)


	5. Some Tensions

Hi guys! Okay, so thanks to everyone who reviewed my story – special shout out to **Etain **and **PurpleGem589**. It's SO encouraging to hear. And I'm glad you think Keisuke is in character. I'm trying to keep it as close to his personality as possible. Anyways, I've been SO swamped in work – writing out my thesis, I've just been going through such a horrible stressful period. But you know, I already had this written out, it just needed some revamping a little. So I thought, why not just finish it and finally get it out! So here it is! It's a short chappie, but it sets some things up for the future =). I hope you all enjoy it.

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**Chapter 5: Some Tensions**

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At first the change was small, and Keisuke barely noticed it – a few extra lotions placed neatly on the abnormally clean bathroom sink counter, some extra hair care products, and an occasional chap stick. Small though the changes in the house were, Keisuke welcomed them. He was right about asking her to live with his family. She seemed less moodier. She cooked with his mom, pitched in with the chores, and even his father who normally spent late nights at the hospital had been coming home a little earlier. Somehow, she was starting to light up their family and draw them in. Even though the Takahashi siblings and their parents were on god terms, especially since Keisuke picked himself up again, they more or less led their own separate lives. But somehow, and Keisuke wasn't sure how, having her in the house made their family feel less disjointed. Even Ryosuke seemed to have taken a keen interest in her. He'd been awfully curious about the circumstances and her relationship with Keisuke. But she seemed to have passed the litmus test for good intentions because he seemed to accept her into their home as readily as his mother had. He never realized it before, but it was very difficult to dislike her.

Keisuke made good on his promise and gave her all the privacy she needed. He wasn't too worried about her mental state anymore, she seemed to be getting along just fine. He was right all along, having other people around kept her from thinking too much and diverted her attention, allowing her to deal with her grief in little bits and pieces. She took another week to get back into the swing of things, but couldn't ignore school forever. The work was piling up and it was getting time to start studying for the first round of examinations.

About a month into their living arrangement, Keisuke, who normally could not wake up early even if his life depended on it, had gotten into the habit of getting up every morning with the excuse of work, even though his shift was in the afternoon, just to eat breakfast with her. And did he love her breakfasts. She would always make fun omelettes, French toast, little sandwiches. She said it was the least she could do to pay him back for his kindness. He flinched, part of him knowing that inviting her over to his place was not an act of charity. They would talk about anything and everything, from his racing, to her engineering. His brother would occasionally join them, the few times he was home.

It was on a particularly cold morning and Keisuke had been up for at least half an hour waiting for her to come down. Rather than letting her make breakfast he'd taken the initiative and made it himself. He checked the clock again and realized she'd be late for school if she wasn't down soon. He peered up the stairs internally debating whether he should go and knock on her door or not. He had promised to leave in peace… but they did have an unspoken agreement – breakfast in the morning, just the two of them. As he ascended the stairs he saw his brother's room half open and her small frame tilted against his door. Instinctively, he flattened himself against the wall, so he'd be hidden from their view, ignoring every part of his brain that told him this was wrong on so many levels. Eavesdropping was not Keisuke's favourite hobby and he internally cursed himself for stooping this low. But somehow he couldn't resist the urge to know what they could possibly be saying to each other that would make her so late for their unofficial breakfast date. And yes, he fully and completely realized how absurd he was being, but it didn't stop him.

"… in the end." he heard his brother say.

She laughed lightly, apparently whatever he had said was funny. Why did she never laugh when he talked to her? Then as quick as he thought it, he shoved it aside feeling a bit stupid. "You're absolutely incredible you know?" She said, making Keisuke a little uneasy.

"It's a good thing you're here," he heard Ryosuke say. "It's too bad I'm not home often enough, I think I'd enjoy your company." He said.

"Thank you, Ryosuke-san. I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but sometimes I'm a little glad you aren't home often. You leave this impression on people. You have a certain charm and presence that just draws people in. You and Eiji-kun are exceptionally alike in that manner. When I first met him, he was saving my kitten's life and he sounded so in control, commanding, mesmerizing. He knew exactly what he was doing. From the way you two dress, to your mannerisms, to your calm and collected and kind personalities… you two are really alike…" She trailed off and the two fell into a silence. Something in Keisuke's stomach started to sink, and the feeling was definitely unprecedented.

After a while, he heard her say to his brother, "Thank you for telling me about Kaori-san. She must have loved you a lot. I can definitely see why."

"I hope you understand why I told you about her…" He heard his brother say in a strained voice he'd never quite heard before.

_Yeah, I know exactly why you told her, _Keisuke thought frustrated. He couldn't handle any more. He knew their conversation hadn't ended but he didn't think he could listen to any more of this… He helped himself down the stairs discreetly and forgetting about breakfast, just grabbed his keys and took off in a hurry. He didn't even know why he was so unhappy and unsettled. It was unlike anything he's felt before and he couldn't really put a finger on it.

Keisuke spent the rest of the day upset and in a bad mood. His afternoon shift at work went horribly and he snapped at every one of his colleagues. He didn't even cut poor Kenta any slack, picking on every trivial mistake his protégée made. Finally when work was done, he drove up to Mount Akagi rivalling the record he'd set for the course a few months back or so. Once he was up there, he took a cigarette out and lit it, enjoying it and not caring that it was probably turning his lungs black.

Of course she would be completely charmed by his brother. Hell, who wouldn't be. His brother was intelligent, accomplished, had the famous Takahashi good looks, and was the most brilliant street racer Keisuke knew. He was a legend. And Keisuke knew that it didn't matter what he did, he would never measure up to that. Maybe that's why he was so annoyed with Eiji-kun. Because deep down inside, he knew that Eiji-kun was the same type of guy that his brother was. They were cut from the same cloth. And that was the type that women like her fell for. It was those kinds of men that women like her revealed their irresistible laugh for. Miserably, Keisuke lit another cigarette aware he was starting to smoke up a chimney.

As the sun set and the dark settled in, Keisuke saw headlights in the distance. He recognized the car that was coming his way and groaned internally. It stopped just short of him and out came Kenta looking troubled and disgruntled. "Keisuke-san, I thought I'd find you here."

Keisuke put his hand out and offered his friend a smoke, "Peace offering?" He asked, looking apprehensive. No matter how upset Keisuke was, he shouldn't have taken it out on his friend. It was something his teenage self would have done.

"Keep it, I like my lungs healthy and full of clean air," said Kenta, taking Keisuke by surprise.

"Since when?"

"Since my girlfriend likes them that way," he replied smugly.

"Oh, you sly dog…" teased Keisuke making the poor man blush in embarrassment. "Got yourself a girlfriend, did you? No wonder I've been hearing less and less from you lately."

"It's only been a few weeks, nothing too serious yet. But I think I'm starting to fall in love with her." He said. "And she thinks I'm the best racer in the world," he added, somewhat flustered.

Chuckling, Keisuke asked, "Does she know the truth?"

"Nope, couldn't risk her falling in love with you," he joked.

Keisuke couldn't help but laugh. This is why the younger Takahashi loved Kenta so much. He always had this innocent way of making Keisuke feel like he was the best thing in the world. It felt good to have a friend like Kenta who always looked out for him, and Keisuke knew that he sometimes didn't do that relationship enough justice.

The two leaned over the guard rails in silence after working on Kenta's acceleration and drift techniques for a few hours.

"Keisuke-san, you know if you want, you can always talk to me…" said Kenta. "I know something's been eating you up. Your driving was reckless and you've been in a mad mood all day. I think it might help if you blew off some steam and do what you usually do – yell at the guardrail. But I think you should let it out and talk to someone, even if it's not me, I'm sure Ryosuke wouldn't mind listening even if he's busy…" Keisuke's faced turned dark at the mention of his older brother.

"Yeah, I'm sure he wouldn't mind at all," he said sounding more bitter than he meant to.

Before he could say anything else, he heard an awfully familiar engine. Turning around, behind the glint of the bright headlights, he made out Ryosuke's FC3S taking the corner and coming to an abrupt stop in front of the two. While Keisuke was expecting his Aniki to step out, he did not anticipate the girl that was currently driving him insane to be there too. It seems like Ryosuke must've have picked her up directly from school, he thought, not missing the bag slung over her shoulder pinning her wavy hair underneath it.

"Ryosuke-san!" Gushed Kenta, "Wow, how long has it been since I've seen you on these streets!" Something about Kenta's idol worship of his brother reminded Keisuke why he was so bitter in the first place. He had no desire to stick around and watch his brother and the girl be a couple.

"Empty parking lot, overseeing the lake, of course they'd be here, it's a fantastic spot for a date. Sorry for interrupting," Keisuke said coldly. Kenta blushed at the implication and Ryosuke raised an eyebrow in amusement, while the poor girl looked bewildered in shock. Before anyone could say another word, he brushed past the two, got into his car and high tailed it out of there.

* * *

Don't kill me! *Hides in corner* Okay, I know I may get a bit of hate from everyone who LOVES the Takahashi relationship, but you know what! It had to be done! We need some sibling tension. You'll see why it's so important =P. Okay! Til next time =) Please R&R, if you liked it!


	6. Do You Understand?

Hi all, I'm BAACCCKKK! Lol. Well, this is a short chapter – got lots of homework, so the procrastination fairy has been my muse =P. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed my story, I honestly write this story for you guys. I hope you like this next chapter. It's a short one, but I hope you will enjoy it nonetheless =). And without further ado….. Voila!

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**Chapter 6: Do you understand?**

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Keisuke heard her and his brother come back – she chuckled softly at something he said and thanked her for the night. No doubt Ryosuke was being his usual charming and intellectual self. Keisuke was painfully aware of what a thug he seemed to be in comparison to his beloved older brother. He hated to admit it, despite wanting to be like Ryosuke, a part of him knew that it didn't matter how much he tried, he would never be able to get there. His brother was in a league of his own. While Ryosuke was well mannered, put together, composed, Keisuke was unrefined, raw, and hot-tempered. He reacted first asked questions later. Maybe he should learn to have more patience. It was easier said than done though. How did Ryosuke manage to stay so in control all the time? He'd never felt so inadequate before in his life. It wasn't even a competition. And for the first time ever, it wasn't good enough to be second place.

Keisuke supressed the urge to scream into the pillow or punch a wall, despite the fact that he couldn't shake this ugly feeling of jealousy. He wasn't even quite sure why he was jealous. Was it _that_ awful that she seemed to have found a friend in his brother? No, he didn't think that was it. He was just upset because for some reason, she could seem to be friends with him. He knew what that reason was. It was simple. Ryosuke was a carbon copy of Eiji. Better even. But this… it was wrong. His brother shouldn't be a rebound. She would use him to replace Eiji, and once she wised up to the fact that he wasn't, Ryosuke would get dumped. He deserved someone better. He deserved someone other than her. It just wasn't right. And she… she deserved someone who wasn't a living reminder of what she'd lost. Why couldn't they just see that?

He turned over onto his back and took a deep breath. _Remember those good old days my only worry was dusting Fujiwara?_ He thought. Seemed like a lifetime ago. Keisuke didn't know when, but slowly in his frustration, his grew sleepy and he drifted off to sleep, for the first time since she moved here not caring when he woke up.

* * *

Keisuke woke with a start. The curtains were being pulled open and the sunshine seeped through the window invading the inner sanctum of his blankets. What's that he smelled? Hmmmmm…. Sausages? And eggs too. His usual spikes were in lumps as he stuck his head out of his comforter and peered through half open eyes.

"Who knew you were such a heart throb in the morning," a voice shook him out of her stupor and he sat up straight, his blanket falling to this waist.

She chuckled, seeing his flustered expression. For some reason, he blushed as she sat down gingerly on the edge of his bed and placed the breakfast tray in front of him. He noticed a meal for two – juice for her and coffee for him.

"This is my bedroom! What are doing in here?" He asked somewhat colder than he'd intended to.

"Well, since you've seen me sleep in my bedroom, thought I should return the favour," she said light heartedly.

"Seriously? That was a totally different situation. I was being a gentleman!"

"And now I'm being a lady. Come on eat up. Missing breakfast will make you fat," she said.

Part of him still held yesterday's grudge, but then his stomach growled embarrassingly loudly. He blushed a deeper shade of red as he picked up the fork and dug in to the eggs first, just barely seeing her trying to stifle her laughter.

"You didn't have to come up here. I would have woken up eventually and eaten something. I got along just fine before you moved into the house, you know." He said, seeing her wince. That was a low blow.

"I thought you'd gone into a hypoglycaemic coma or something, you were asleep for so long." He looked at the clock beside him. NOON! Shit! He really had slept in.

"You're skipped classes…" he said slowly, aware she should have been at school by now.

"I did…" she said a little hesitantly. "But I wasn't feeling well this morning. And besides, we didn't get to eat yesterday either. You'd already gone by the time I came down. The food you made would have tasted better if you were there," she said looking at him with a soft smile.

"Yeah… didn't want to interrupt the tender moment you and my brother were having yesterday morning," he said, fully knowing he was treading on shaky ground.

"You should apologize to him you know. He left this morning a bit quiet. Quieter than usual, I mean. And he won't be home for at least another three days," she said.

Keisuke threw his fork down with a clang and stood up, giving her a nasty glare. "You know absolutely _nothing _about my brother! Don't think that you can read him so easily!"

She looked at him wide-eyed with shock. Then lowering her gaze to the tray on the bed, she said, "You're right… I don't know him. But I do know men like him. He's your big brother, Keisuke. He might not say so, but he'll always want you to look up to him. He needs your respect as much as you do," she said softly.

"And _you _would know _all _about respect," he said spitefully, turning away from her. "Your boyfriend isn't dead a month and already you're warming up to my brother. Poor guy must be turning in his grave." He knew he'd put his foot in his big mouth this time. _Dammit, dammit, dammit! You do NOT bring up a mourning woman's dead fiancé up, especially when said woman skipped classes and made you breakfast! _It's like his mouth had a mind of its own.

Almost afraid to assess the damage he had caused, he turned his head slowly to look at her. Her head was turned and she was looking out the window. She stood up, her hair covering her face in a shadow. She mumbled something and walked out of his room, but not before he caught the stray tear that fell down her cheek. Shaken out of his stupor, he followed her just as she closed the door to her room. He was about to knock, but the painful sobs coming from behind the door stopped him as he raised his hand.

_Wonderful, Keisuke, just freaking wonderful!_ He was so ashamed with himself! How was he supposed to comfort her when her when all he could do with his big mouth was cause her more pain. For the first time since she'd moved here, he was questioning his decision. Maybe moving in here was the wrong thing to do. He was obviously incapable of comforting women.

He didn't bother knocking on the door, he just simply walked in. She was huddled on the ground near the foot of her bed. Furiously, she wiped her tears. "I know he's dead. I don't need _you_ to remind me," she said her voice thick.

He crouched down so he was eye level with her. "I know that."

"You don't know anything," she said. "Keisuke, I would have gone down a terrible road if you had just left me alone that night. If it wasn't for you taking me in, giving me something to look forward to every day, I would never have made it. I owe you so much more than words can even express," she said in a quiet voice. "But the truth is… you have _absolutely_ no idea what I'm going through. Ryosuke… he… he understands exactly how I'm feeling right now."

"I want to understand," he said suddenly. He wanted in. He was tired of giving her space. He wanted her to lean on him. He wanted to be her only source of comfort. He didn't think he could stand his feeling of being useless anymore. She scoffed and pushed him away.

"Keisuke… I wish I could forget about him. I feel like I'm suffocating when I think that I'll never see him. I wish, more than _anything_ I could just forget his existence and move on, but I _can't._ I just can't. There is a void, where he used to be. Every morning when I make breakfast, I remember how much he used to love my omelettes, that he took his coffee with three sugars even though he hated sweets. Ryosuke is SO much like him that I can't wait for him to leave because being near him is like being near Eiji-kun and it hurts so much when I realize that they aren't the same person. It hurts so much that sometimes I wish that Ryosuke was Eiji-kun. And I know I sound horrible. But I can't help it," she paused trying to compose herself.

Keisuke didn't know what to say. He couldn't know what to say. Helplessly, he watched her burry her face in her hands as more tears spilled from her eyes.

"Ryosuke… he gets it," she said. "He told me about Kaori-san. He knows what it's like to wake up in the morning and not know what it is worth living for. He knows how I feel, Keisuke. He knows exactly the kind of despair I feel."

Keisuke sighed. In that moment, he wished terribly that he knew what she was talking about. That he could share some of her pain. She seemed to have sensed his conflict and cupped his cheek with her hand. "Keisuke, I pray that you never have to understand how I feel." His own hand reached up meet her small one. He tilted his head and he kissed the inside of her palm. He pulled her into his chest. He felt the tremble of her shoulders as she cried, knowing that this was probably the best he would be able to do. He knew it was sick, but somehow he felt satisfaction that he was the only one who'd ever seen her vulnerable side. He knew his brother wasn't home often enough for her to breakdown like this with him. Then as soon as he felt it, he felt the sense of shame that came with finding satisfaction in her pain. _I'm definitely screwed up in the head, _he thought.

Suddenly she pushed him away and ran to the bathroom. He followed and saw her throwing up in the toilet. "It's okay, I got you," he said, moving behind her holding her hair back. When she was done, she rinsed her mouth in the sink.

"Sorry Keisuke… it's your cologne… I caught a whiff of it, and I already wasn't feeling well," she tried to explain.

"It's alright," he said. "You don't seem to have a fever, but you're a bit clammy and pale. Actually, now that I think about it, I think you've lost a little weight too. Maybe you're anaemic?" He tried to reason.

"What? I might not want to be a doctor, but I have been around quite a few," he said smirking. He forced her into her bed and pulled the covers over her. "Get some sleep, I'll shower and then make you some soup for later," he said.

"Okay," she said weakly. "Keisuke… thank you."

He turned and left her room. Somehow he felt a little lighter. He still didn't know what his brother had said to make her feel like there was a point in living every day, but he knew that she needed him too. That he had been helpful. Maybe that's all he'd wanted. To feel like there was a place for him in her life.


End file.
